I should try and be relaxed and not get worked out. I see the office boy who sits at a table a little away from my desk. He is eating something. The phone rings. He finishes his eating, throws away the cover and then picks up the phone. He takes his time. Maybe he has a lesson to teach.

If I were in his place, I would leave the eating and pick up the phone. I have this tendency to ignore 'me' very often. All this piles up and one day the anger comes out in an undesired form on my loved ones. Maybe that's the reason why he says that I should give myself that '1 hr' of lunch time. For everything I have this 'jaldi,jaldi' attitude and I reach nowhere.

I see around me a lot of 'not-so-capable' people holding such important positions. Maybe they are very capable in things that I fail to see. Maybe that is why they are actually very 'successful' and I am not so 'successful'. Maybe I criticize too much. Maybe I look for perfection in everything.

But I realize it is so very difficult for me to put up with mediocrity and mundaneness. I keep questioning God about these things. Why did he give me eyes that scan ? Why did he give me a brain like this which is so intolerant to mediocrity ? It is actually a pain when you can't laugh at those silly jokes and find everything around funny and hunky-dory !

Oh God ! I hate so easily !

Somehow the both of us have it very very tough...

His migraine keeps coming every day now..I am not giving him enough nutrition. There is so much that I have to take care of in terms of his health and all, and I do very little. I hate myself like this.I like to be in control of that migraine thing. I used to be able to do it sometime back. Please don't worry yourself much. Things will be ok...

Sometimes,I feel like asking God, why just the both of us ? He who gives us so much pain also puts a smile on our faces when we meet others. And these 'others' think that we are very happy and cast evil eyes, thereby feeding that 'tough' loop ...

To all those who cast evil eyes out there ...Let us live peacefully please..We are not going to intrude into your lives.So please don't intrude in ours. We let you be. So, let us be. Is that too much to ask ?

And God ! Better do something to keep this devotee of yours ...I am slowly but surely becoming an atheist..

Hi,

These consultants are one stupid @$$#### lot man...

The first time they send an email, they will be literally begging you to send the resume.Once you send it to them and then try and follow up with them,they will behave as though you are a pack of dirt. I have treated a few consultants with total disrespect and they keep calling again and again. And I mean STD at full rate ! Treat people with a lot of respect and they think that you are a beggar !! Treat them with utter disrespect and they treat you like God ! I don't understand this !

Meanwhile somebody at WordSoup has some nice observations about the 'value of a human life'.